I returned to college this week, hence the absenteeism. There have been a few minor stresses and complications, but on the whole I have very little to complain about.
My college experience is bound up in thoughts about how people get dressed and the decisions and choices involved in putting outfits together. I am fascinated by this process, and I am by no means alone in this, of course. I wore a uniform throughout my school years, and so on starting university last year the novelty of wearing my own clothes everyday and constructing outfits on a daily basis proved to be a significant perk.
Generally I drift through campus silently admiring the attire of the anonymous crowd I wander through. However, when I'm tired and stressed out, I get picky and in the end this negativity results in me berating and ripping apart (although not literally!) whatever I so happen to be wearing rather than anyone else's outfits.
My frustration generally lies in my own lack of creativity. I want to dress in a way that I consider to be somewhat creative, but so often (or at least this past week), I choose the safe option and then feel angry with myself for doing so.
It's a rather silly stress - out situation, I must admit. But my dress sense is a major part of who I am, and therefore, I have to dress in a way that represents me and my inspirations. Sometimes this can be a 'mad', creative outfit, but the majority of the time it is just an outfit that I felt captured my mood and mindset at that particular time. When I feel an outfit doesn't represent any of the above , it is then that this great sweep of melancholy overcomes me. ( don't mind my melodramatic ways...)
Basically, this rigmarole is a reminder for me to dress how ever it is I want to dress, without apologies or without outfit - directed negativity at the end of the day . I can only ever dress in this way, in a manner that captures my mood, my interests and comfort. There is no other way. And I must not forget that.